Seriously, ya'll. Some movies just plain suck these days. Since I have been under the weather, I have been hitting the Netflix queue pretty hard and heavy. I have had to give out some low marks lately. Some examples.
Disturbia: Good god. I hope Shia LeBoeuf's presence in the new Indiana Jones movie doesn't stink up the joint like he does in this piece of crap. He can't take all the blame, the writing was pretty dreadful, and I don't even know how it ends because I got fed up and bailed out. Hey Hollywood, while we are on the subject, why don't you quit trying to do new spins on "Rear Window"? Hitchcock got it right the first time. It just isn't going to get better no matter how many hot chicks in bikinis you put in.
Spider Man 3: Oh, spare me the whining. This overwrought emo-fest drove me to relentless heckling in about 10 minutes. Peter Parker is a weenie. Mary Jane Watson should give up acting and try to learn how to be a better waitress and stop weeping, already. The CGI-heavy villains needed more screen time and, I dunno, some motivation to do bad things other than "I'm a tortured soul with not enough love in my life"! Gah. Even with all the stuff that blew up, I just didn't care. I really wanted that whiny Kirsten Dunst and her funky snaggle teeth to plummet 50 stories for once.
Blades of Glory: Someone should just make a big montage of various guys taking shots to the balls and have done. Will Ferrell was great in "Stranger than Fiction", but his recent spate of sports spoofs leave me flat. Whatta goober. Jon Heder was so awesome in "Napoleon Dynamite", I think he very well have jumped the shark on his whole career. Snaps for his beautiful golden locks in this one, but it is still lame.
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